How do you identify your loans?
How do you identify your loans?

I know a guy in Billerica who, like most people, got tired of making the monthly mortgage payments on his house for decades.

But last week he emailed me some really good news, which might make his life easier.

“My home loan decided to identify as a student loan,” he said. “Do you know what that means? I won’t have to pay it again – ever!

This is wonderful news, and I predict that “transitioning” all debt into student loans will be the next big thing in the equity racket.

I mean, if a guy can suddenly “identify” as a woman, then why can’t an overdue invoice identify itself in a category where it never has to be paid?

Personally, after studying my recent rather large credit card statements, I’m starting to “prepare” my Visa bill to become a student loan – so I can claim “forbearance” and not experience any “accumulation” of student loan payments. interests.

Hey, what’s good for a Queer Studies major should also be good for a taxpayer with two jobs, right? Certainly, the equal protection clause of the 14th Amendment extends to debtors.

All bad payers are equal under bankruptcy law.

If these losers who owe over a trillion dollars in unpaid student loans don’t have to pay back the money they owe, why can’t an electrician tired of making payments on his F-150 just ” transfer” the payment on his pickup into a… student loan?

What he would then never have to repay.

Property taxes, lines of credit, condo fees, alimony, child support, library fines, anything – why can’t normal people request “bill reassignment surgery” and live big on arm, like an illegal alien or a Democrat?

In case you missed it, maybe because you worked 70 hours a week to pay your bills, last week Dementia Joe Biden again extended the so-called moratorium on federal student loan debt.

For those of you keeping score at home, this is the sixth time since March 2020 that deadbeats have taken advantage of this ongoing scam – twice under Trump and now four times under Brandon.

Such an agreement – no one is required to repay the principal of their loan and no interest accrues. The only ones who don’t benefit from Uncle Sam’s largesse are those roughly 300 million Americans who either didn’t go to college or paid their own way.

Incidentally, no one forced the academics concerned to assume these obligations. They could have joined the army, learned a trade or found a real job. Or just paid what they owed.

But no, they wanted to study… sustainability, third world slamming or wind power for dummies.

One thing we know for sure is that none of these college kids learned Latin, because otherwise they might have learned the meaning of that ancient phrase – Caveat emptor.

Buyer beware.

Taxpayer tab for student loan scam estimated at $100 billion so far. This latest document, which runs through August, will cost an additional $15-20 billion.

But it’s necessary for what the AOC calls “families de travail,” which in English stands for “non-working non-families.”

God knows they need that extra $400 a month they pocket on average – it at least pays for some of the tattoos, bling, weed and fortified wine they’ve been bingeing over for the last two years.

This latest welfare scam comes at a time when the unemployment rate for bachelor’s degree holders is 2%. Many of these deadbeats took advantage of all the other new handouts that proliferated during the panic — like eviction bans, PPPs, PUAs, bonus food stamps, extra child benefits, “unemployment” checks. » more generous, etc.

The fact is, for tens of millions of people in the slacker community, panic has been their finest hour.

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